Thursday, April 15, 2010

Me and the big bad thing

You know that girl, I'm sure you see her everywhere; shes the one you see sitting alone on a bench. She is the one writing poetry in home room before the bell rings. The one who is so ignorant that she breaks her own heart. And if you know the girl, you already know the guy. He walks in five minutes late just because he can. At six foot three, he's captain of the football team. He's got an expensive car and even more expensive friends. You see him listening to the latest Lil' Wayne music on his $150 i-pod. He's your average, run-of-the-mill hunk/prince with a brilliant mind, a good sense of humor and superior muscles that are an added bonus. Everyone knows the story of Cinderella and Prince Charming. But, wasn't that a fairy tale? This is real life. Things dont end up happily ever after here.

O.k. so maybe i exaggerated a little big. He really isnt 6'3" and not the captain of the football team. But you get the point he is so perfect and i could never be good enough to suit him. I guess if i could ever work up the courage this is what i would say to him.

"All i know is that i have to think about not thinking about you. You are that perfect image in the back of my mind that stays there forever no matter how hard I try to will it away. When you smile it is like the sun coming out to shine after a grey, drizzly morning. You are like the perfect love song, the passion that sweeps over you, the lyrics that seem to flow through mid air and tickle your ears with the whole truth behind the meaning. Its like your insides are filled with melting chocolate and your turing into a rushing river of soft sweetness....but unfortunatly you will never feel the way I do."

Ahh, the bitter irony of it all. The single thought that he could possibly love me is enough to set tears streaming down my face, because I realize how utterly ridiculous it is. He's never going to know how i feel because I will never be able to work up the courage to tell him the truth. It is a rather sad story but it is the story of my life.

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