Sunday, July 4, 2010

Big Green Dot!

Sometimes you are happy, sometimes you are sad. Right now there are honestly so many different emotions running about in my head. I don't know what I feel. I let someone in my heart, and they destroyed it. Then in a few short days I was fine again, and back to normal. But now someone else has walked into my life and captured my heart. I keep trying to get it back but it is impossible. He has no idea what he has taken from me, its a very vital organ not meant to be tampered with. He is just friends with me for now, but I cannot deny the feelings I have for him. He lives three long hours away, but from the second I saw his picture I felt something snap. I will never, ever be the same girl again. He has permanently changed me, and I don't know how to cope with the emotions tearing my apart right now. He is so cute, and sweet and funny. He makes my day just by simply existing. He could flip my world upside down if he wanted to. I don't know how I am supposed to handle this. It makes me want to cry, because I know he will never ask me out. We live too far away. But we have so much in common and I can tell he likes me, too. But fate has to be cruel. Around, Wil, I can be myself. I don't have to think about what I say, I just say things and they seem to be good enough for him. He accepts the fact that I am a good girl, and have rather strict parents. He makes me laugh more than one guy ever could. When I see he's online my heart skips a beat, and I live for the big green dot next to his name.
Ugh, when will I ever learn to listen to my brain over my heart? I know I will just keep dreaming about him, until the day when he stops replying to my messages. Until then I will still wait on the big, green dot.

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